Ok, so if you just enjoy the cute pictures and really peppy "our life is amazing" and our kids are charming posts, you might want to stop reading now.
This week has been one of those weeks where I feel like if there were mommy licenses, mine would have been revoked! You know the days-- you raised your voice often (although 1/2 the times you would have liked to), muttered under your breath that you'd give your kids away to the highest bidder (or anyone who would take them and return them sweet and smiling even if you had to pay), and were in tears while TRYING to get them to sleep so you could get a shower. Yeah, it's been like that.
Don't get me wrong, the week hasn't been without it's bright spots: lunch with friends, another outing to the splash park, and dinner ALONE with James while friends watched the kids were all great! The weather has been gorgeous. But, I have to admit that I get to Friday and feel like the whole week is gone and I achieved nothing except escalating frustration.
Lydia just mastered sitting and pulling-up on her own in bed, so Sunday night she decided at 10pm that she was done sleeping in her bed. Three hours of trying-to-settle-her-down-repeatedly-to-screams later, we finally decided we all needed some sleep and she slept in bed with us until 5am or so. (Which I realize works great for some people, but co-sleeping in our house is not restful for any of us.)
Monday night, I got mastitis. For those of you who've experienced it you know what that means--for those of you who haven't (count yourself fortunate) think a bad case of the flu with intense pain. Anyway, that pretty much did me in for the next couple of days--thankfully my wonderful husband was able to combo sick-time and working from home to help out with the kids the first day, and they both slept at the same time letting me get a nap the next. I'm on the mend again, thanks to a good antibiotic, but that was not my plans for the week.
Tuesday, in a random act of meanness, Joshua kicked Lydia in the face while she was playing on the floor, making her bleed and giving her a black eye. I have no idea what the appropriate punishment is to something like that! (I can think of several, but they all seem weak in an area or two--or over his ability to understand.) I feel like I try to give him one-on-one attention and pay attention to his needs equally to Lydia's, so I don't know why he felt it was necessary to act-out by hurting his sister either. He was sort-of sorry after he saw she had an "owie" but I don't know how to evoke true remorse lovingly. Plus, I've gotten to take my daughter around all week looking like I either a.) don't watch her well or b.) hit her. She too is on the mend (in fact, the bruise is almost gone)--but I'm dreading this type of sibling violence, I didn't anticipate it, hopefully it is VERY short-lived.
Today has been probably my worst day with two kids since Lydia's first few weeks. It seems that they both have it in for me. Joshua is being 2 1/2 in all it's glory--mouthy, short-tempered, and at times downright mean. He's also been irrational and defiant. I feel like I've spent all day so far telling him "no" or putting him or his toys in "time-out." Lydia has decided that a great combo to that would be refusal to sleep. I just finally got her down 20 minutes ago (it's 3:30) for her first real nap of the day (she dozed for 10 minutes in the car around noon) after a 45 minute "battle" where she couldn't keep her eyes open, but screamed everytime I put her in her crib. She didn't want me to rock her or feed her, but didn't want to be in bed either. She'd be nearly asleep in my arms, but instantly wake-up and start fussing as soon as I lay her down. I finally caved and resorted to nursing her to sleep--even though she really didn't need to eat, but was just upset. So, this day has certainly added to my feelings of mommy-failure.
I'm sure in a couple of days, particularly days with an co-parent 24/7 my perspective will be back, but right now I think I might go crazy! Anyone else experience days (weeks) like this? I know we all do, but when you're in the middle of them, it seems that everyone but you has it all together. Sorry for the length and the rant, but I needed to let it go somewhere! :)
Have a great weekend...I'm blowing you all some of our clear, sunny, upper 70's "perfect" weather!
7 comments:
Oh Liz...yes we all have those times...an no, the rest of us don't have it all together! Today was a "no" day for Forrest...everything was "no no no" even graham crackers! I am sure that you are doing great with the kids...it's a learning process and it always will be!:) oh yeah! Enjoy the weekend with James around...that will help!
oh yes, i totally know where you are coming from and you are NOT alone!!!!! i've had many weeks like that and have just wanted to pull my hair out! i'm sure you are a wonderful mama...it's all a learning experience for all of us :). i am also dealing with sibling "meanness." liberty will being loving on her sister one minute, and beating on the next. so hard to deal with at times. so...you're not alone. praying for you. and i know it'll help this weekend with james at home! be sure to take some time to yourself while he is home to help!
Maybe there was something in the air today? Madeline was a real beast today too...thankfully there was only 1 of her to deal with, though! Oh, and I had mastitis 4 times when I was nursing Madeline so I feel your pain. The antibiotics were a god-send for me! Having a helpful husband is always a good thing too. Hopefully the weekend will give you the break you need and the kids will get back to their sweet, charming selves by Monday :)
Liz... While I'm not a parent (yet) I know how those weeks go from a teaching perspective. I'm lucky in that they go home at 3:30, however, you're lucky because you get to see how they change and grow. My students are forever stuck at ages 5/6/7. Hang in there. We'll be praying for a better week, and one day you'll have to remind me when I'm ranting that everything is gonna be fine. :-)
I'm sorry you're stressed :( I understand, sometimes everything just seems to go wrong! I hope this is a good week for yo to make up for last week.
In the thick of 2 1/2 (and all its glory) with you Liz! I finally got to catch up on your blog tonight! Cry if you need to-I myself found that very helpful yesterday, after trying for an hour and a half to get Hope to nap. (I finally gave up.) I really hope that your weekend is going good! Hope loved seeing Joshua and Lydia today. She came home and started talking about how her baby doll "Maya" is a crawler and a climber- just like baby Lydia. Soo cute!
I'm just catching up on your blog too and I have the deepest empathy for you! I have weeks like that too. Ella is in a "no" and throwing stage and is getting defiant (before 2 even). And Amelia still has her fussy times and has needed to be held a lot more lately. Some days she's not content in one position for more than 20 minutes at a time - difficult when I'm trying to work out and then shower, or do anything that requires two hands. I hope this week is better and I'm sorry you have weeks like this too, but at the same time it's a relief to hear you DO have them too!
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